Handling Panhandlers

RZRBUG

On my way home from Tearstock, I was approached by a young man at a rest area who gave me one of the saddest sob stories I've ever heard.  It mainly involved having car trouble and needing the get his family back home, among other things.  I have had no experience with such things in my part of the country, although I have heard and read about it.  I must say that about half way into his story I was almost believing him.  But, I'm not totally naïve and my radar began to deploy so that by the end of his story I knew what was going on.  I told him I barely had enough money to get home on myself.  He seemed to accept that and walked off, I guess to proposition someone else.

I'm sure I'm not the only one who has encountered this.  When I told my brother about it, he said they usually ask him for money to buy food and that the conversation usually ends when instead of money, he offers to take them into the nearest establishment and buy them food.

Anyway, how do you handle such situations, and are there obvious things that distinguish panhandlers from someone really in need?

Verna

Larry, the Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Dept has asked the residents of Indianapolis to NOT give money to panhandlers.  Only a very low single digit percentage of the panhandlers are truly in the bind they claim to be in.  Many drive to their "normal" panhandling locations in cars better than many people can afford. Those with noticeable limps, casts or foot boots are strangely cured for the overnight within a block or two, but come back hobbled the next day. Some who claim to be homeless take a bus or drive to nice homes. 

So, I know there are many who have had traumatic incidents happen to them, but because of the high number of bogus claims, we need to harden ourselves.  The police have asked citizens who want to help to please give to the programs that do help the homeless and those down on their luck. 

When you get home, look up the number or address of a local food bank, a homeless shelter and make a donation to them or volunteer your time to them.  It does make me feel better to donate time or money when I have to force myself to ignore. 

jkjenn

Bear in mind that the panhandler can also be a ploy  to distract you and set up to be the victim of a crime like being mugged or your vehicle being broken into.

RZRBUG

Well, of course, I donate to charities as well, my favorite being the USO.  When you are already out of the vehicle and are approached on foot, as I was, retreat becomes a little more difficult.  I was not overly concerned as the parking lot was rather crowded and it was daytime.  In retrospect, I should not have shown any interest in his request for help and just walked away.  You know, I pride myself in being a pretty good judge of character, but when you are in a strange place, your guard is sometimes lowered and your judgment a little impaired.

Michigan_Mike

I have fallen for this ploy and been snookered a few times so am more apt to turn a blind eye and proceed on my way.   I could go on and on and remembering my brother offering this woman a job, handing her a business card and telling her he would put her to work in the morning and then seeing her promptly turn and walk away quickly....  These ordinances are being debated in our area now as there are homeless signs and people standing on many corners at freeway exits and I have been approached in rest areas, restaurant areas, etc. by people looking for spare change and cash.  

sgttiki

Regarding Panhandlers: Years ago, I knew a guy who was a panhandler in NYC. He dressed the part, but not too shabby. During a conversation with me and a high ranking Police official (in civilian clothes). The panhandler revealed his average "daily take" which was equivalent to a nice, middle class income with an additional benefit; it was tax free! The panhandler lived in a very nice suburb of NYC with his school teacher wife and two children. He commuted to work via train, panhandling during his trip, I suspect. He had all major holidays off and took nice vacations with his family! (I viewed him as a scoundrel ) I told him so, but didn't use politically correct phrases). My condemnation didn't phase him!

Here's how I [sometimes] handle being approached by panhandlers/beggars:

"Geez....what a coincidence. I was just going to ask if you could spare a few bucks. I have a long trip home and don't have enough gas money."

Or: I have two kids in college. I'm living in a trailer! Do you really think I have spare anything?"

These are my "nice" responses, given on days when I'm feeling "nice!" 

To those who feel guilty about not giving to the "needy" (panhandlers), donate in your hometown and/or to a known charity!

Given they're scoundrels, never let a "panhandler" near your belongings. Let someone in authority ( Law Enforcement, store employee, etc.) know of your concerns! 

Nomad

sgttiki - Something similar in Mpls - The panhandler would drive his caddy into the city from Edina (a wealthy suburb) everyday, change clothes and beg. End of day, change back and drive back out to suburbia. Had a very comfortable life in the burbs among the executive country club set.
The #1 spot for beggars in my travels so far has been Kingman, AZ - Seemed like they were on every corner.

Rad

Come to the west coast if you want to see lots of homeless.  Ya I know I'm a bleeding heart liberal when it comes to social issues and the homeless are no execeptions.  Out here the majority are mentally ill, manic depressive, etc.  often times this is compounded  by alcohol or drug problems.  A small percentage are homeless as a lifestyle choice.  

Years ago ago going to college I worked at a community center, a converted school with lots of rooms and different classes going on in each room each night.  What a pain setting up and breaking down that place.  Well, a homeless guy came in  need of a place to sleep.  After a few days we got to know him and later on each evening after he helped us clean up and break down chairs and tables we would "lock" him in our warm basement so he could sleep on the cot we set up for him.  The building was locked and so was the basement so no one could enter but Ed could of course get out at any time if he needed to.  The City leaders all knew of this arrangement, including the police, yet no one ever spoke of it because it violated many city rules.

This went on for many years and was a wonderful positive symbiotic relationship.  

Homeless are just people that for one reason or another are not able to cope with what has become a very complicated society to be successful In.

I'm  not necessarily in favor of giving them cash, but please don't kid yourself that most of these folks are urbanites with nice cars earning a good living on our street corners.  No, the vast majority live sad lives and struggle with their mental illnesses. 

Giving to shelters, food banks  and the like are great ways to show some compassion for those individuals.  And if you worry that someone in not great need may get some of this help instead, it really is no big deal, there are those dishonest types in every walk of life and profession.  


"There but for fortune go............."

Nomad

Good point Rad - we pointed out the exceptions, not the rule.
I have some good friends that work food lines 2-3 days a week and the majority that come thru have some mental/social disorder. The problem got bad in CA when they shut down most mental institutions but then (Regan Admin)  never set up the halfway houses or support structures they promised - from what I've read or been told anyway.

source3

What has worked for me is to gently knod my head "no" and gently wave my hand "no" (side to side), palm down, fingers flat.  All-the-while looking them in the eye and giving them a stern look.

Rolling up your widows will not stop panhandlers approaching.  The alert stated above has always worked.  

sgttiki

Yikes! Politics and social issues discussed on the T@B forum? WOW! A hot button for sure.

OK, here's my thoughts: If Libs want to help the homeless, that's fine. I'm not a Lib and do (often) help our homeless Military Veterans.

However, if all Libs step up (not just in words), donate money, food and give up a spare room in their homes (or T@B's with outdoor shower) we could eliminate much of the homelessness and it's associated problems!

As for panhandlers, I (mostly) avoid giving them money. At times, when I see a person in need, I will give them money or goods. As long as they're not PANHANDLING!

Nomad

We should probably drop this thread :-)

sgttiki

Makes sense.

Rad

PXLated said:

Good point Rad - we pointed out the exceptions, not the rule.
I have some good friends that work food lines 2-3 days a week and the majority that come thru have some mental/social disorder. The problem got bad in CA when they shut down most mental institutions but then (Regan Admin)  never set up the halfway houses or support structures they promised - from what I've read or been told anyway.

The Lanterman-Petris-Short Act.  Yup the mentally ill were dumped on the street when that Act passed.  

Good  for your friends.  I ran a large fund raiser each year around the holidays and it felt very good to see how thrilled the organizations were that received the money and food that was raised.
   

RZRBUG

Since I started this thread, I feel compelled to make some clarifications due to the above comments.  When I used the term "Panhandler," I did not mean to imply that those in need should not be helped.  I am not a "Liberal," but I do have a heart.  My question was directed at those who were not in need but preyed on the sympathies of others.  You can usually tell the difference.

I believe, as given in examples above, that there are better ways to help those in need than handing money to "Panhandlers."  Those truly in need will usually accept offers of food; those trying to game the system often will not.  You can even guide them to homeless shelters (if ones exist in your area) or to churches or other organizations that have specific missions for such circumstances.

I will and have given money (food, clothing, etc.) to those I know to be in need, but it will be rare indeed if I ever give money to a "Panhandler."

And, one other thing, I try not to be judgmental of those in need nor of those who do, or do not, help them.

sgttiki

Anyone notice that since the Lyndon Johnson, "Great Society" programs began, there has been a MASSIVE spike in the %'s of those in need (Homeless, single Mom's, out of wedlock birth's, poverty stricken, worker's compensation claims, etc. etc. etc.)?? Coincidence? I think not.

Offer hand-outs, whether government sponsored, or otherwise, and the "needy" will miraculously appear in staggering numbers.

Sgtjohn

Sure, there is massive increase in "needy" people since LBJ.  I was in Vietnam when he signed that Bill and I was a young pup.  As for homeless veterans, they have programs at the Veterans Administration that aid them.  They'll feed and water them and I believe give them a bed for awhile.
I know there are programs at the VA-I worked there until I retired.  And I've seen 100% disabled veterans poor as a church mouse because they couldn't handle their money or relatives took their share first.  On the other hand, I've seen veterans blind due to Berri-Berri or glaucoma and they told me they were blessed and weren't angry at anyone for their condition.  We have  a LOT of great veterans.

sgttiki

ABSOLUTELY! That's why I fully support our Veteran's! GOD BLESS THOSE WHO SERVE, AND HAVE SERVED!

Nomad

Sorry sgttiki but you have presented no proof that it's not coincidence. And since the big crash of 08, there's plenty of needy that weren't even alive when Johnson was in office. But neither politics nor religion really have a place in the "T@B" forums in my opinion. I won't be visiting this thread any further.

Verna

While there have been occasional "small" comments about politics, the original intent of this discussion was one of observations and a general question.  Please take this discussion back to its original intent.  We really don't need to be discussing former or current political administrations. 

Rad

Back on topic, I have had no experience with pan handlers in any developed campground.  The times I have stayed in rest areas and the like I have and I must admit I dislike panhandlers knocking on my trailer door as much as I dislike people going door to door at home.  

Bentr

My wife and I did notice more people asking for help at rest stops along I-5 last month than we had seen in the past. 

After struggling for what seems forever to try and figure out the sagacity of the story I was being pitched (in order to avoid being 'tricked') I have given up trying. I'm pretty sure I will never really know the circumstances of whomever is asking for money and also am convinced it's not really my business to know or to judge. What is my business is whether or not I feel moved to give money. Sometimes I do, more often I don't. Since I don't care whether what I'm being told is a lie or is the truth, I am no longer at risk of being fooled and feeling like a naive fool (or even the bleeding heart liberal that I secretly am). 

Sgtjohn

Right Bentr!  Someone came up to me the past few week and said he'd come to OKC to obtain a job in construction and said he needed $150 to return hime and he held out his hand and said he had almost enough with the money in his hand.  I reached for the money in jest and gave him a few bucks.  As long as it doesn't hurt me or my family I don't mind sharing what the Lord has blessed me with. Sometimes you can just "feel" that it's a rip.